COVID Wedding Planning
As a wedding planner, I pride myself on being able to problem solve, be the calm for my couples, and pivot to make the best of any situation. These skills have been essential over the years to navigate a variety of wedding concerns, from a last-minute wedding party adjustments to mediating mother-daughter “discussions”. Now, those skills are more important than ever as the world changes rapidly through the COVID pandemic. No matter where your wedding date lands on the calendar, I guarantee that the uncertainty of the moment is impacting your wedding planning. I want to share a few thoughts for any couple balancing the stress and the joy of wedding planning.
First and foremost, no matter what life throws at you, I am here for it. I saw a great quote that said, “You’re not paying a planner for when things get rosy, you’re paying a planner for when shit hits the fan. It has, and we’re ready.” You have a fairy godmother for when all those amazing plans start to go a little haywire, and you want someone you can trust to work some magic. Even Cinderella shed a few tears in the garden before she got to go to the ball. Take a minute and grieve for the changes you are being pushed into. Then, take a deep breath and let’s work some magic.
At this point in the game, I am working with couples to explore a couple of different options. The first is a complete reschedule. This seems the most daunting, and probably is. But, it is also the option that allows couples to hold onto as much of their original vision as possible. I remind couples that their wedding date is just a combination of numbers on a calendar and doesn’t have to define their wedding or their love story. If this option becomes the go-to solution for a couple, I take the stress off them by taking the lead to contact and coordinate with all their vendors. I create a detailed chart sharing the available dates for each vendor, the vendor’s cancellation policy, and the postponement policy for each. This allows the couple to easily evaluate their “next best yes” date. It sounds crazy, but the couples that have worked with me on this process have shared that they were pleasantly surprised at how quickly and smoothly we were able to shift the whole celebration. It is a big job, but remember that you have a little bit of magic on your side!
Another option for couples who don’t want to tackle a complete reschedule is for them to carry on with their official ceremony, albeit a smaller version, in order to be “married” on their original date. This alternative means that couples will be celebrating with their guests at a secondary date. The pro is you get to wear your dress twice! The con…this one takes a little maneuvering with vendors, as some of them will have a second date of commitment, which could come with additional cost.
The third version is to move forward as planned, with adjustments to allow for celebration and social distancing/responsibility. In this scenario, we look at changing table layouts and assignments to keep immediate families together and fewer people seated at each table. Changing to plated vs buffet is also an option to eliminate some of the “contamination” opportunities. Obviously, thorough cleaning/sanitizing and offering additional hand sanitizing stations would also be added touches. Both of these options are also subject to local ordinances, which can be difficult to anticipate with enough advance warning for planning purposes.
If your date falls in a current “Safe” zone on the calendar, but you are still struggling with the uncertainty, my advice is to keep moving forward. You may need to wait to go dress shopping or cake tasting, but you will get there, I promise. Keep planning and keep dreaming. And, keep crossing off that “To-Do” list! “Hope for the best and plan for the worst” is a favorite phrase of my “realistic” hubby. I have adopted that philosophy when it comes to wedding planning. I want my couples to focus on the “best” and their dream for their special day. Behind the scenes, I will be busy planning for any of the “worst” so that I can protect my couple as much as possible.
My final piece of advice applies to anyone, not just those planning a wedding. As life shifted dramatically in the first days of “social distancing” and “quarantine”, I was struggling. The curve ball of suddenly “homeschooling” my kids, running a small business from home, and facing all the uncertainty (groceries, economy, health, employment) had me reeling. Then, I remembered what my mom always taught me. “Do something nice for someone else, and it will help you too.” So, I dug deep and started to search for ways to give back and ways to lift others up. Care packages sent from a small business went out to almost a dozen of those dear to me, flowers from a favorite local florist got dropped at the doorsteps of neighbors, I purchased gift cards for future services from hair and makeup artists, cupcakes from my bakers went to the staff at hospitals, giveaway prizes for my brides were purchased from local bridal stores, and I worked with one of my local caterers to send lunch to the staff at my mother-in-law’s assisted living facility. I don’t share these to brag, but to encourage you to look around at how you can care for others, even while at a distance, and how you can support small, local businesses when they truly need it the most. You might be pleasantly surprised at how much better you feel when you find a new “normal”. It may take awhile for life to even out, but our drive and ingenuity will be what pulls us through to the other side.
Vendor Credits: Photos Courtesy of Solis Photography, Wilcoxon Photography, and Cadey Reisner Weddings. Care Packages from BOXFOX. Floral Bouquets from Bella Rosa. Hair & Makeup Artist Gift Card from Beauty by Kat. Cupcakes from Cakes & Confections by Chef April and The Cake Lady. Bridal giveaway prizes from Bridal Gallery, Ellie Stone Bride, and Marie & Marie Bridal. Catering Services by Rollin’ Pin.